Chala Murari Hero ban-ney!! Cannes ki yatra -

Announcement at Bombay terminal for Air France flight-
Yatriya kripaya dhyan de. Murari hero ban-ney chala hai Cannes. Unkey irdh girdh koi bhi vastu ko na chuiye. Yeh aap ke liye katharnaak saabith ho sakta hai.

Prelude

Cannes, a place of trivia for filmmakers, a place of splurging and indulgence for many of the rich European lads. A place nested in the South of France, this place has its own charm of a different kind, and yes, it comes for a price, and that too an exorbitant one. If France is an expensive place, Cannes is criminally expensive. But ironically, I am told it is expensive only during the festivals when the menu’s double up or even triple depending on the festival. A few notes on the place.

a) There are 40,000 dogs in the city (petted dogs)
b) The average life of a person in these lands is 92.
c) French women dress all their way into the coffin.
d) French would not speak English, even though the place is an international destination for many festivals. (I was told that they know English but they are too arrogant to speak it)

If you do not understand French, here are some tips -

1. When you accidentally step on/ bump into/ trip over a French woman, and she reacts sweetly, it doesNOT mean that she loves you. The problem is that French language sounds so sweet, you might mistake an abuse for a sweet lullaby.
2. Always smile and greet – Bon jour is the usual greeting used, and also end the conversation with Merci Beacu (meaning – Thank you)
3. Try to be animated while talking. Hand gestures are very good way of decoding the language

Observations about people –

a) People in Cannes are usually stylishly dressed. Be it 16 or 90, they are all well dressed. Even the waiters wear D&G, Chanel, Louis Vuitton etc. That explains the high bills and exorbitant tips.
b) They are amazingly fit. Almost everyone exercises.
c) French people are full of love. They can make love anywhere. Place time and surroundings are immaterial for expressing love in all forms and shapes. (Mumbai police, are you listening)
d) It’s a fact that the Europeans are rich. European beggars are also rich. They beg in Euros.

For people who are back again, this post has been edited. When I re-read the post, i realized i must have been drunk when i wrote the post and must have banged my head into a garbage can before i typed. My apologies for such bad writing. The chronicles of Murari is being re-written. By then keep your eyes open for the Click Zoom Snap blog update in a couple of days!!!!